narwhal-noir:

I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”

person: OMG YOU DIDN'T STUDY FOR THE TEST???!?!?!

me: nope

person: BUT HOW ARE YOU GONNA PASS???

me: i'm not

innercitylights:

i fuckin hate the type of person who enters a room when a show is on and starts talking. what the fuck is wrong with you. who the fuck raised you. are you an animal. get out of my house

mumsonfans:

I ran away in floods of shame
I’ll never tell how close I came
As I cross the Holland road
You went left and I went right
As the moon hung proud and white
You would of loved it here tonight

Spin me round just to pin me down
On the cover of this strange bed
Spin me round just to pin me down

Wrap up your questions keep them down
Let the water lead us home
And I was sorry for what I’d done
And you were young, I was not old
But our story was not told
But torn apart by greedy hands

Spin me round just to pin me down
On the cover of this strange bed
Spin me round just to pin me down

Spin me round just to pin me down
I’ll be gone by the nights end
Spin me round just to pin me down

I’ll be home in a little while
Lover I’ll be home

And I’ll be home in a little while
Lover I’ll be home

lannistersex:

"THAT SHIRT WITH THOSE SHOES?"

lannistersex:

"THAT SHIRT WITH THOSE SHOES?"

plasticbagvevo:

ketchupday:

plasticbagvevo:

never microwave a caprisun

what did you do

i microwaved a caprisun

benpaddon:

The phrase “words to live by” gets thrown around often these days, but these are absolutely words to live by.

gaia-is-sucktastic:

don’t lie we all do this with our friends when we see someone attractive

sanitaryum:

The Captain America/Puerto Rico pic  AND Marvel’s majestic response

artbymoga:

"#yolo"

Inspired by this fantastic song.

840px:

life hack: remember to compliment people on qualities other than their looks. remind them of their kindness, thoughtfulness, and intelligence. tell them about how powerful and capable they are.

jtotheizzoe:

generalelectric:

If Earth’s water were drained into a single drop, it would measure about 950 miles in diameter. Roughly three percent is fresh water, and just one-third of that is easily accessible. Meeting the growing need for water is a critical challenge. Many countries rely on desalination to produce fresh water, but current techniques are typically energy-intensive, using enough energy globally to power nearly seven million homes. That’s why today GE is launching an open innovation challenge to improve the energy efficiency of water desalination. Find out more about the challenge here. GIF by Julian Glander and based on data from Woods Hole Oceanographic Institution.

GE you put that water back right now, you hear me? We need that.

jtotheizzoe:

generalelectric:

If Earth’s water were drained into a single drop, it would measure about 950 miles in diameter. Roughly three percent is fresh water, and just one-third of that is easily accessible. Meeting the growing need for water is a critical challenge. Many countries rely on desalination to produce fresh water, but current techniques are typically energy-intensive, using enough energy globally to power nearly seven million homes. That’s why today GE is launching an open innovation challenge to improve the energy efficiency of water desalination. Find out more about the challenge here. GIF by Julian Glander and based on data from Woods Hole Oceanographic Institution.

GE you put that water back right now, you hear me? We need that.

thejunglenook:

khaleesri:

"no homo" I whisper as I look at my garden of pea plants. The progeny had expressed a 1:2:1 ratio of phenotypes. I am Gregor Mendel. 

This joke is lethal

alisonhendriix:

When your friend’s otp happens to be your notp

image

image

lunalovecorfe:

durkin62:

watchoutboy:

OH MY GOD WHY, WHY DO YOU DO THIS ON A SITE WITH 13 YEAR OLDS WHO WILL ACTUALLY TRY THIS, STOP

Natural selection.

I wonder if there’s unnatural selection…

lunalovecorfe:

durkin62:

watchoutboy:

OH MY GOD WHY, WHY DO YOU DO THIS ON A SITE WITH 13 YEAR OLDS WHO WILL ACTUALLY TRY THIS, STOP

Natural selection.

I wonder if there’s unnatural selection…